lifes a bed of circles.

hm, today's probably the worst i've been in since school started. worst being the worst mood, the most irritated, the most angsty, the most pissed off. i dunno why, mayb its the weather, mayb its just a mood swing, mayb its just thursday and tomorrows friday, or maybe its just me.

well, many people had warned me about how people are gonna change when we enter JC. all the testosterone-charged guys are just gonna let their hormones run wild and just go crazy, buaya-ing, flirting to the max. others will just change, give up on their old friends, making way for the new. it might be good it might be bad, we are all 'lookin for our life partner' of sorts hor. (in my dreams) so yeap, i guess it's really quite sad as to how some people have changed.

sch started off great. orientation rocked. my og rocked. the first few days of sch with lectures have been ok. im not complaining. my class is cool despite the 11 foreigners which yea kinda makes it a little dull but whatsoever, it's still a great class. 08S06J. pretty fun and well, i guess i still have liang in my class again but, right now, i dunno if its a good thing or bad thing. haha!

so basically, ill just requote myself, life sucks, it likes to go one big round and kick you in e butt, before going another round and kickin u again. life just goes in circles and circles where things from the past just happen to come back again in this sort of deja-vu-ness and make u feel weird.

everyday i go to school, i meet up with my og, i see the same things. ok well, gossipin may be fun. but well again thats another point that i can say how poeple have changed. when in RI did u see so many people like to gossip? when did u actually bother about other peoples scandals and ask around like hell. when in RI do u see people proclaimin their love for others on msn nicknames. well, its like apparently the whole RI batch has been hit by a 'oh gossipin is the new cool' bug and everyone's going around about it. or at least a hell lot more people are.

apart from that, is it not boring after a while once u keep repeating e same thing. personally i believe strongly in e phrase 'once bitten twice shy' (at least i think so) and well, once is more than enuff for me unless i totally like it, or ive nothing else better to do.
analogy:

A: hey tell me about ur thing with C leh?
B: huh wat thing? -feigns innocent- nothing la! -looks around pretending nothing is happening-
A: fine..

changes topic.
after a while,

B: ah ya why ur whole day laugh at me one.

moves back to same topic.

rinse and repeat.

ok maybe e analogy is not so clear cause i dun wanan make it too obvious whom im talkin abuot but i guess if you noe wats going on you will know. and so ken, dun say i didnt support u. i've had my say, now it's just my turn to watch the show and shut up.

hm another thing i have to say. trust. sometimes u just feel that u can totally trust one person, yet after a very short while, u totally realize ur trust has been misplaced. im not gonna discriminate agianst girls/guys/whoever. but i think im just sayin that i have paced myself wrongly and like yh, trusted people too early. it reallly makes a diff. sometimes, it really IS easier to just talk to guys about anything under the sun, especailyl those u have known for a long time. mayb its just me being in a guys sch for 10-yrs already so i trust guys more. (im NOT gay) but yea, lol i think i just noe more guys better than girls.

i really wonder if wat i tell some person will get passed on to a wrong other person at times and just totally get me into awkward positions. imagine u bitch about B to person A, then person A goes on to tell person C but somehow person B finds out along the way. doesnt it just go one full round and kikc u back in the butt after that? im not saying that i have encountered this as of yet, at least not a full scale one, but i guess prevention IS better than cure and to prevent myself from gettin into any such spastic situations, ill just shut up. it's about time i start to rebuild my rep of being honest and nice. but mess around with my integrity or abuse it, and i WILL hate u forever. lol~ (maybe i will or maybe i won't but i'll just say i will for now)

so.. yeap, im totally in a bad mood tonight and well, too bad if u crossed me but i apologise for it oso. i'm just gonna go back to sch tmr, quiet as my old self, nonchalant about whatever else might happen, just to watch the show. it's real true how people say life's like a tv show, everyday, u get to watch one episode, whether ur e director or cast i dun really care, but the plot that develops everyday is sth that i wanna watch. it totally beats watchin any other stellar movie at times. so yea, we'll just see how things go.